Friday, May 29, 2009

Thursday, May 21, 2009

back and forth with a coworker - too funny not to share

Andy says:
do we have monday off?
Sean Walsh says:
does the pope wear a funny hat?
Sean Walsh says:
he does
Andy says:
does your mom gurgle?
Sean Walsh says:
she does
Andy says:
dude from the DMV hasn't called back?
Sean Walsh says:
he has, im just keeping it a secret
Sean Walsh says:
you will be the first to know brotha
Andy says:
let's get his address and do a stake out in front of his house
Sean Walsh says:
i am supposed to call him at 11am today....cross your fingers
Sean Walsh says:
if that doesnt work, im done for a stake out
Andy says:
i'll cross my fingers, toes, eyes, and my cock if it can bend that way
Sean Walsh says:
if it can, can i see? not gay, just that would be incredible
Andy says:
are balls crossable?
Sean Walsh says:
yes
Andy says:
i think i'll call it a twizzler

Friday, May 1, 2009

tid bits...

I think Rondo would have beat the shit out of Kirk Heinrich. I disagree with you J, the refs made the correct call. Rondo didn't throw a punch. He did grab his arm and fling him into the scorers table, which is a flagrant foul. These are the playoffs, and these are grown men. He deserved to keep playing, and he did. The C's will win in game 7 at home, but I do question how far they will make it in these playoffs without KG. Ben Gordon is a tank. I can't stand the sight of Joakim Noah, but did you see him take the ball the length of the court and dunk on Pierce? Impressive. Anyhoo...Ned, how you doin? Perry, Mank, Perv, Newtsy, Snake...what's shakin? Snake, when you coming home? Will I be rich someday? I sure feel like I will do something big and important in my life. If only I had stayed in school and gotten a post-grad degree of some sort. Although, what's really important in life? My grandfather who died before I was born was asked what his goals in life were. His reply, "kids." He had four of 'em. What are my plans for the weekend? I'm going by Trader Joes to pick up a few bottles of their Coastal Cabernet on the way home. $4 a bottle and pretty darn good. I've got some big meetings next week that I'm definitely looking forward to. Maybe one of them will make me rich. I used to drink a lot. I still do, but I used to too. Peace be with you, and also with you.

Friday Music Day

Friday, April 24, 2009

Rendezvous in Paris

On an August morning in 1978, French filmmaker Claude Lelouch mounted a gyro-stabilized camera to the bumper of a Ferrari 275 GTB and had a friend, a professional Formula 1 racer, drive at breakneck speed through the heart of Paris early in the morning . The film was limited for technical reasons to 10 minutes; the course was from Porte Dauphine , through the Louvre, to the Basilica of Sacre Coeur.

No streets were closed, for Lelouch was unable to obtain a permit.

The driver completed the course in 8 plus minutes, reaching nearly 140 MPH in some stretches. The footage reveals him running real red lights, nearly hitting real pedestrians, and driving the wrong way up real one-way streets.

Upon showing the film in public for the first time, Lelouch was arrested. He has never revealed the identity of the driver, and the film went underground. If you haven't seen this before it is a classic, if you have seen it I apologize, but it's still a classic. Turn on your sound and enjoy.



best...song...ever

Thursday, April 23, 2009

MV - Martha's Vineyard Hollar Back

big game today...big game

tid bits...

C'est la vie...somebody shit all over the toilet seat, flusher, and wall behind the toilet on my floor of my office building. It's the only shitter on this floor, and now it's ruined for eternity. Now I go to the first or third floor to poop. It was bloody too which makes it even more disturbing. There are electrical problems at our new rental. Last night at about 10pm the circuit blew. I went to the side of the house and my neighbor Rose who is in her 60's and lives alone with her two dogs Russell and Cow Girl must have been scared shitless. You see, our houses are probably 8 feet apart, and there are meth heads and bums as any urban area has. I'm rummaging around, her dogs are barking their heads off, and I feel bad. I really don't want to call the landlord, but I guess I have to. My car got side swiped in the San Diego State parking lot on Monday. The guy was nice enough to wait while Colleen was in class. She got all his info but I haven't called my insurance company yet. It's just a couple little scratches, hardly worth the hassle of bringing it to a body shop, and renting a car. But, I guess I should get it fixed as the dudes insurance company will pay for everything. It's just a pain in the taint, ya know? Also, I'm way behind on the wedding plans. C'est la vie.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Friday, March 27, 2009

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

i think i know this guy

MANSFIELD, La.—Authorities arrested a 32-year-old Texas man on drug charges on Thursday after construction workers saw him on his hands and knees, eating mud and growling like a dog. A woman who accompanied the man from Texas told investigators he had been wandering around the complex and eating dog food.
Sheriff's Lt. Horace Womack said a small bottle of PCP, a half-pound of marijuana and one-fourth ounce of crack cocaine were seized during the man's arrest.
The man was booked with possessing all three drugs with intent to distribute them. He was placed in a cell where jailers at the DeSoto Detention Center could keep an eye on him.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Thursday, February 19, 2009

pointless dialogue part deux

Ned says:
nice post on the blog buddy
Andy says:
yeah - we're pretty interesting people
Ned says:
i was doing 15 things at once
Ned says:
couldn't chat
Ned says:
thats fuckin great though
Andy says:
let me guess, 1. jerking off 2. taking a shit 3. brushing your teeth. 4. tying your shoes 5. thumb up your bum 6. sun tanning 7. sucking cock 8. cooking dinner 9. driving 10. perfecting your golf swing 11. hopping on one foot 12. combing your hair 13. trimming your pubes 14. drooling 15. instant messaging me
Andy says:
am I on the right track?
Ned says:
except for # 7
Ned says:
was actually getting my cock sucked
Andy says:
what's his name?
Ned says:
Bubbles
Andy says:
what a weird name for a boy
Ned says:
a black man
Andy says:
ok - that makes sense then

pointless dialogue

Ned says:
you on here?
Andy says:
yuppers
Ned says:
just got mylaptop back
Ned says:
was getting fixed
Andy says:
that's nice ned - i don't give a fuck
Andy says:
what are you doing today?
Ned says:
well u asked why i was never on IM
Andy says:
whatever dude
Ned says:
Nothing
Andy says:
is it cold where you are?
Ned says:
40
Andy says:
it's 75 here - going surfing after work
Ned says:
sweet
Andy says:
when are you moving out here again?
Ned says:
soon enough
Andy says:
are you happy to be back?
Ned says:
yeas
Ned says:
yes
Andy says:
did a cat walk across your keyboard?
Andy says:
or are you typing with your balls?
Ned says:
my tongue
Andy says:
ew
Andy says:
i need to get on the vegas trip
Andy says:
are you living in portsmouth now?
Ned says:
yes looking for a place right now
Andy says:
i miss you neddles
Ned says:
i miss you to Andy
Andy says:
do you still see ren and sharon ever?
Ned says:
nope
Andy says:
really?
Ned says:
haven't seen them in over a year or so
Andy says:
where are they?
Ned says:
no idea
Andy says:
woah
Andy says:
that's craaazzzyyy
Ned says:
not really
Andy says:
yeah - but i thought they still lived in portsmouth too - guess not
Ned says:
i think ren does
Ned says:
haven't seen him since we lived together 2 years ago
Ned says:
he was on the Vineyard for awhile i think
Andy says:
hangin at the damp toast with sonny?
Ned says:
probably
Andy says:
so - the whole trip to puerto rico was good?
Ned says:
it was a lot of fun
Andy says:
any crazy shit happen?
Ned says:
just pissed away $
Andy says:
that sucks
Ned says:
love rileys blog
Andy says:
yeah - he's pretty cool
Andy says:
he needs to post more though - he's gettiing lazy
Andy says:
so ned - get to work and save some money for vegas
Andy says:
we've got some catching up to do
Ned says:
working on it buddy. gotta run i'll hit you up later
Andy says:
alright - god bless
Ned says:
PEACE OUT BROTHA

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

cnn poll - this made my day

Quick Vote
Which do you find more objectionable?
Michael Phelps' bong 6% 10911
Alex Rodriguez's steroids 53% 94112
Equally objectionable 27% 47303
Neither is objectionable 14% 24921
Total Votes: 177247

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Thursday, January 22, 2009

My company - helping out our boys in Iraq



I feel like a fool for taking so long to reply and then asking for something. Yes I am great and am still out here in the Anbar Province.
I have a request that would probably get you some great mileage.
The Iraqi Police Departments here are broken up into "Districts" which would be the equivalant of "Counties" back home. In my region I am responsible for 2 Districts (Hit and Baghdadi). Each of the Districts has to EMAIL a morning report using yahoo every morning to Provincial Headquarters in Ramadi. It includes any significant events that happened the previous evening.
Ramadi constantly screams that the districts aren't reporting when I have stood right there and watched the communications officer hit send.
And on the 31st of January we will have historic Provincial Elections which will be a first for Iraq in decades.
I would like to set up both of my districts using your service so they can shove it upo Provincial's butt. I'd also like to hook up Provincial HQ but am more concerned with my Districts. Hooking up Provincial would just be a feather in MY cap and make my life easier.
Can you help me with hooking up my districts? If nothing more than just for a short time to show the Iraqis that technology can be used for their benefit.
If you send me another one of those giant stickers we can put it up in the Provincial Communications Center and have all the Iraqi operators stand in front of it too.

Also, if the Iraqis are using this to send reports to the Dept of State and they havent made their minds up about the service, they'll say "WTF! The freakin Iraqis are using this! WHY ARENT We!!!!"!

Thanks for any help,
Your friend and supporter Mark Wilson



lassification: UNCLASSIFIED1stSgt Mark Wilson USMC(Ret) #D62089OIC, Hit/Baghdadi DistrictMNF-W, Al Anbar ProvinceU.S. Department of State, CivPol MissionBureau of International Narcotics and Law EnforcementIraqna: 790-298-0106Mail Address:Mark WilsonPolice MissionUnit 73354APO AE 09333-3354

Friday, January 16, 2009

Wednesday, January 14, 2009